Is suffering really essential to ascend?

 Is suffering really essential to ascend?

 

Recently, I found myself saying in a conversation, ‘Afterall! Suffering is the highest currency to evolve!’ I did say it - as I had always heard it. But suddenly, I got to thinking, ‘Is it really true?’

To a certain extent, suffering does contribute to bringing one closer to divine and oneself. For, in your extreme joys, you tend to be just happy in the moment and forget anything else. Actually, even in extreme grief that a person forgets everything else and is rather drowned in one’s sorrows. However, when one suffers – again and again – regardless in whichever field – the person then thinks of God, or reflects back upon life or considers the path so far or ahead to somehow make things right!

Still, there is a limit to even suffering. One can say that God/divine/cosmos tests your limit and faith. That your destiny checks your endurance before gifting you with your destined fit!

Yet, why? I mean, are we in an exam or a preparing for a battle?

What logic does it make that we all must suffer to be better at simply being or living?

I can give you both for and against!

Diamond must stay grounded for eons. It must tolerate that much heat or pressure and even later must undergo the chisel and stuff. Else, it remains coal. The process of cooking is essential, else one remains a raw vegetable. Good things take time. A tree must initially remain like a seed – underground, then grow for years – bearing all weather; and only after that that it bears fruits. Process is crucial, so is time and so are the challenges involved. The tougher the situations you handle in life, the stronger you become!

Yet, is it really true?

Do we always become strong with difficult situations?

What about traumas, abuse, life altering circumstances, accidents, wrong relationships…so on!

Yeah! Humans somehow always find a way to endure. Actually, everything does. Our breaths are fixed. And we just don’t exit the matrix before that. Even if people commit suicide, it is believed that the soul still reincarnates and undergoes the same situations – till it learns the lesson.

Is it just a game? What exactly are we preparing for?

If we all began from the purest and brightest of lights…if we all within hold divine… If consciousness is what drives us all. What is the need for so much of suffering?

There was a long phase of my life, when I used to prefer staying on mountains. Away from humans. At off-beat places. Away from connections and vices of relationships. I used to find it more peaceful.

Someone told me then that it is easier to claim that you know driving when you are driving alone in an empty field. The real test happens when you drive in the city and still don’t lose your calm. Meaning, that I must find that peace within that remains unperturbed regardless of my external location or circumstances.

The lesson was true in a way, but I couldn’t help it. How does one unsee what one clearly sees? If I find a fault in humans, how do I accept it? Acceptance is crucial. That’s the first step to peace. That and the realization that one everything keeps on changing and another we can’t change so many things/people/circumstances.

But, I am a firm believer of choice. It is my hard-earned lesson in life that if you don’t like something then change it. If you can’t change it, then change your perspective about it. What if none of these two is possible? Then remove yourself from that situation. I have left cities, jobs, lifestyles, habits, relationships – in the blink of an eye – just because I realised that something was no-more healthy or aligned with me. That lone wolf phase was the time when truly no-one aligned with me. I was finding faults in everything and everyone. So, I preferred to be with myself to somehow have peace.

One can say that if you are finding fault in everyone then probably the fault is in you. Not always. But maybe that can also be true.

Thing is, I didn’t choose to see so much of truth in my connections or in humans. But now that I see those flaws, it initially became impossible to accept and later digest.

Now, I have come on terms with it. Now I have realised that I can’t change others. That it is neither their fault nor mine. That humans all over are giving into greed and selfishness. That consumerism and capitalism have infact overtaken the world.

Yet, I am keeping my inner child safe. And I still hope to find my tribe somewhere. Where humans are still humans. Where artists create for the sheer joy of creation. Where people meet and greet for they are genuinely happy to see you and not because they want or need something out of you. where benefit is not the basic criteria for connections.

Thing is, I had to suffer. Undergo so many realisations. Choose to still love. But with awareness. And in limit. And by being extremely picky and selective.

And here my spiritual learnings also become an obstruction. For, on one hand, there is no other. Everyone deserves love. We all are love. We all deserve love. Love is the most beautiful thing – our raw material, our ultimate gift. That all anyone wants is love.

But on the other hand is this 3 D reality. Where no, love is not enough. No matter how true and genuine emotions you have for people or places; there are still so many factor involved. Your own family would disown you if you won’t behave in the expected mould.

How do I unsee these fake connections solely based on benefits? How do I unsee what I can see clearly – that either people like flattery or numbers. That money and position is god. That history is written by one who wins. That there is nothing like justice. Everything needs you to be stronger, wilder, loud, dominating – to the limit of it becoming obnoxious.

That though we were taught to become soft like water for softness too has its own strength, but in today’s world; it’s not softness that’s accorded or rewarded. You have to fight for everything. You need to pretend to be someone you are not.

Fake it, till you make it. Blah! What a fucked-up concept.

Whatever happened to being true to our emotions? Whatever happened to authenticity, to genuine expressions?

Yet, if we all always remain genuine; we would all be suffering with melancholy! As at any given time, there are always both good and bad sides. May it be real events, moods, emotions, situations or perspectives.

So, maybe instead of faking; it makes more sense to register the blessings and be grateful for them.

It is however difficult to stay grateful for basic when you have been in survival mode for long and know that you deserve more. It can be anything – financially, emotionally, intellectually, literally – whichever field!