Towards dawn

Progressing towards a dawn towards the end of November. The last crescent of a silky goldish moon. One prominent star above it. The sky is a ruled sheet of greyish rainbow. Beginning from blackish grey on horizon to shades of red than yellow and blue and then a deep violet. The shades are changing every moment. A black bird passes between the moon and me.
The day is gaining it's glow now. It's getting brighter and clearer every moment. I can see a clear difference between shades right now.
A bridge seems broken below the moonlight. It's covered by a misty fog from all sides. It's beautiful and in solitude in the wide open rainbow sky. A single bird flies right below the moon and far from it.
The star accompanies it.
Sky gets richer in tones of red and yellow in the middle. An eagle flies right across it. There is blue on either sides of the red and yellow ribbon. And violet is reducing it's circumference.
The moon is a dull gold - fore vintage like. Sky in all other directions is now white.
Delhi seems like some other magical city this morning. So beautiful, so colourful - with a moon and me.

Mystical being

Everything is a myth - the earth and snow. So is the girl so beautiful - lying on a mud thatched floor. She is bare with the most pretty skin - the one that glistens in sun. It's soft and oily - it's smooth with hair falling gently. She lies stretched with her back facing sky. Towards her head is a wall - the same like that floor.
The tones of colors of her skin matches with that of the floor. Ortonish the effect with a dusty core.
They are chocolaty the shades of her. A white flower so fragrant to lure.
An earthen pot hanging from the ceiling - drop per drip - drips the warm essence of healing. The drips bounce then float upon her silky skin. She gasps a breath then lies so still.
The earth embraces her from below - the cold of soft mud merging with the warm vapors on floor.
Behind her were clouds - grey and snow white. They drown in the sea of sky.
And she enters into her most beautiful state of being. Oblivious the body - mystical being.

Her silver and gold

The giant moon
So red in color
It's bleeding golden
And a sweet voice
A sufi touch.
The moon seems like a face
Woman's
With her eyebrows
Large eyes
And pretty nose.
There are lips as well.
Her silver and gold
Flows like locks
On either sides.
And the halo is like sparks
In all directions
As if moon is
Inside a star.
If I half close my eyes
It's even closer
Reaching right between my lobes
Aah! What pleasure.
Just she and I
The beauty of this moon
Every moment
Passing by.

So close

You are so close
Like I can touch you
And hold you
In my arms.
I can let my head
Rest on your silver.
Can merge in you
Seamless
With no thunder.
But a gentle sweep
Right into your soul.
A love embrace
With all my coal.
Let's burn
To light the world.
Vibes of ocean
Let's listen to the pearls.
The walls of us
Are emerald colored
The shells.
But let's wriggle out
And merge in the world.
Let's be nameless
Let's be one with the world.
With all it's colors
And textures.
Let's love even sun.
You and I
One.

You are so close
Like I can touch you.
And hold you in my arms.
Dear Moon!

Thoughtless

I wanted to be
Thoughtless
Totally free of that burden
Of 'what if!'
Of 'why not?'
And I freeze my thoughts
Letting myself flow.
The world frozen
Into one time.
The puff of breath
Flows with no sound.
I go bare
For a fraction of second.
Orgasmic.
Out of the world.
No thoughts.
No swirl.
Hollowed space.
Not even air.
No. Not even a thought
About thought.
Moon fading in clouds.
High and low
In an extra slow motion.
That one sweep
Of beauty.
The dark sky around
No, no sound.
Tears drop from eyes.
So warm, so full
Of love.
I let them flow.
I let it go.
I dance
Upon my own beat.
Sarcastic and lonely.
And then the good feel
Of thoughtlessness.
Of cutting the reel.
No time. No tense.
No words. No desires.
Only one
Of thoughtlessness.
Fie.

Almost full

Almost full
The moon!
With it's beautiful flaws
Shining in it's womb.
The gold it spreads gently
All over it.
Even around.
Like a glass of whiskey
Filled till brim.
Feels good tonight
Strangely free
So so light.
Lot of work
Healthy smile.
I look at the moon
Ready to confine
My all
Into it.

Nothing stays forever

I have been against normal
The stagnant stable life
The houses build in one shape
The so called society.
I never got the reason
Behind marriage,
For stability.
For I have been a Wanderer
I person who feels at home
When on roads.
And I often seek changes
I look for variety.
Changes in places,
People,
Even homes.
And I was blessed with
Way many beautiful moments
When you just feel like
Saving the moment
For ever.
And that forever I realised
Is the reason.
For it is a myth.
A utopia.
Now I know the reason
Why people seek love,
Build homes,
Make families.
The reason is
To avoid pain.
Pain that changes bring.
Helplessness
That is time's kin.
For then remains
Memories
Of the times of magic
Of those moments.
So they choose one partner
Choose one place
With a desperate attempt
To hold time.
To feel that forever.
But no stories show
'Happily forever'
It is a myth my friend
Just like never.
For only nothing stays forever
Not even love
Even family.
Life is short my friend.
So live as much
As many times
As you want.

Crumpled sheets

Love! I've seen
Alot of it.
It is hidden
Amidst those morning
Bed spread.
The crumpled sheets.
Thrown into ignorance
Distorted lingerie.
The surprise choco truffles.
Those smiles.
The uncalled gidders.
Sometimes it pulls you
Right from the waist
And makes you prance
At a thumping pace.
And the comfort
Upon that warm touch.
Sometimes, it's just invisible
Still there. Like air.
It lies in that silence.
The understanding.
In changed decisions.
In those eyes
So cold to precision.
It stirs
In the warm coffee
Right on a bed
With a smiley melody.
I have even seen it
In fights.
In those angry remarks.
Those nerves so tight.
And then it flows
Along with tears.
So pure. So washed.
With time - in fear.
I have seen love
Alot if it.
But it doesn't seem to end
The craving for it.
And it is not limited
To someone
Or something.
It is huge.
It is a special feeling.
All about vibes I feel.
The fuel of soul
Is love I feel.

Get Anxious!

Anxiety!
A little amount of it
Is surely required.
Actually a lot of it.
I don't mean getting tensed
About something.
Or maybe I do.
But what is essential
To get upset
About a situation
Then change it.
Change! Aah!
It's so evil.
But beautiful.
Falls in the best of
Your times.
And hides itself
At your worst.
I tried being thankful
For the present.
I tried being happy
In the moment
But if all around
You see something
Else instead
No matter how much
You try to be.
Then my friend,
Get anxious.
Yes, upset about it.
Then only
You Change it.
For the fighter spirit
Comes only then.
With emotion
With a stand.
Being calm about everything
Won't help.
Waiting for the right time
Will eventually
Gift you rust.
Get up!
Get anxious.
Feel about about it.
So bad that you
Change it.
It had a reason.
It's a beauty.
Yes!
Get Anxious.

To explore

Do something cosmos
Now you gotta turn your wheel
Spray the magic spray maybe.
Move huge amount of energy
Or slide away the unseen
Obstructions.
But I need just one thing
Right now
The way!
Yeah! I am Mystical Wanderer.
And I like them lost
My ways.
It often makes me feel good
The mystery
To explore.
But you see
I always have
This instinct
The voice
From inside.
This time
It seems so hopeless.
Like it's all good.
So so comfortable.
But something inside
It's dieing.
It want to seize
The world and days.
Time. To shine.
You gotta do something.
This time.
I have faith.
I just keep doing
Karma.
But it is for Karma
I crave.
The right one
To phrase.
I won't compromise.
No. Not coz of my ego.
But respect
For who I am.
For what experiences
You infused me with.
For the talents
I am blessed with.
I know the big Change
Is somewhere coming.
But it all seems
Like a fairy tale.
Like Waiting for Godot.
But weren't those tales
So true
In my childhood.
In my dreams
They still come true.
You gave me
The power to dream.
They were all
Visions
That I saw
From our power.
We are one
Or so I know.
We gotta help me.
We gotta explore
The way.
Aah! This again.
Hello Mystical Wanderer.
I feel the same.

And I dance

I feel so light tonight
Like I shouldn't dance
That too up here
On terrace
Am aware of the
Poisonous smog.
But I just can't stay inside
Day n night.
And it is so crucial
This coming out
Atleast at night.
But the eyes burn now
So do my heartbeat
That I can still feel.
But I so love to dance.
Hence I dance.
I have the power from inside.
No PMS can harm me so.
No destruction more than
Self destruction.
That's why
Am not afraid.
And I dance
Jumping.
My legs' sweep
Rotate forming archs
Half the round
And then I hop
More upwards
Than ever coming back.
But the landing is still smooth
Still on my toes.
And I sit closing my eyes
Thumping my hands
From air till my shoulders
Thrusting them on beats.
I intake an anecdote
Some smoke.
Along with fog.
And I release it all
Like attacking the army
Outside.
Alas! It's all the same
Either sides of the boundary.
We are humans.
Meant to be made of love.
All I see
Is a diseased society.
I feel the pain.
I ignore it.
Dance to make my self happy.
Am I being selfish?
Should I plant a tree?
Or maybe blame government?
Or pray to the Western disturbances
To stop being
The constant foe?
Maybe I should blame the neighbours
For burning their waste
Without bothering about us?
Meanwhile we all suffer
While blaming each other.
No. I say no.
Let's just sit down.
Try taking a breath.
Look inside yourself.
Realise where we have come to.
So I dance in this moment.
Sending some happy vibes
To the universe.
Not careless though.
But aware yet oblivious.
For life is short to change everything.
But if I work on myself
I change what is in it
For me.

Beautiful smog!

On the eve of Diwali
I had wished to die.
I didn't rather
A beautiful smog
Covered Delhi.
I had already cancelled my plan
To travel.
If it was to see Delhi
In it's beauty?
I wondered.
Few days passed.
I realised may be God heard
My plight.
I was blessed with death
That very night.
For the look at this air
Like those beautiful sea rocks
In Sindbad the sailor.
They take you to a dream land.
They are such beauties.
But tranced out you realise
It's choking you
Burning your eyes.
Ether is filled with smoke my friend.
We are all dieing.
All thanks to smog.

It feels unique

Wherefrom do I begin
The tale of my life
The many akin.
I see my reflection
Everywhere.
Yet it feels so unique
Inside me.
The dreams
Or aspirations.
They are different.
Not that I don't want success.
Only that I learned
Living my life
Much before the
Word 'Success'.
And I learn to use the word
Somewhere in between.
So the hierarchy
And it's priority
Is kind of conditioned
In my head.
And I define it also
A bit differently.
I wish I can talk about
Senses and their exposure
First.
For they are the first things
I could relate.
Meanwhile happened
My stand.
The rationality
Of wrong from right.
And loopholes were also
Either given like
Cheat codes.
Or else they were
Self- taught.
But I knew from my childhood
That being honest
Is right.
But in order to save someone
From getting hurt.
It is OK to lie.
Now I chose instead.
I stayed stuck to the first moral.
I see it as my limit
At certain calls.
But the point is
That dubiousness remains.
To what is right
And what is strong.
Which weakness is OK
To publicise.
Where one should be strong.
Apart from one key note
Somewhere as an additional note
Tagged below the page
In extremely small font.
It says, 'listen to your
Inner voice'.
That - just that decides
The right and wrong for me.
And I have been following it since
I really liked the message.
But it's upto each of us
If of that one light
We take any notice.
Sometimes
It can't be seen.
And you comprehend
A certain passage of your life
Through yet another
Misty lens.
It is social in nature,
Can even be personal.
But it is colored
All the times.
In the mist of
Dubiousness.

Should I?

Crazy idea in head
I just wanna leave
This cosy comfy nest
And go out in wilderness
With hardly any penny.
Like just jump into
The valley, the world.
To flow with the flow.
Make music everywhere.
And fulfill my dream
Of a caravan
All alone.
Maybe all good will befall
Who knows
I may even fall.
And die
All high.
But atleast
I would have tried.
Without any resource
From my side
Just this time.
A trust on cosmos
A trial of time.
Should I?
Aah! It's tempting.
The idea itself
Is filled
With excitement
With adventure.
The weather calls otherwise.
Says now is the time
You should be warm
Inside.
But I so wanna be out
Living it.
All loud.
Maybe I will.
I will.

Razor sharp

There is this strange sadistic pleasure
In hurting those
Who hurt you.
Like I have been good
Most of my life till now.
But I see an inner goodness
In sometimes
Doing that for which
The heart whines.
Like say it
Right on the face.
The bitter truth.
The repressed tale.
Make it iron sharp
So thin to pierce
Right through a heart.
Need not be visible.
Your words
Make them real.
There are good dreams
And bad dreams.
When in rage
Make the bad ones true.
Not of yours
But of others.
Then feel
The sadistic pleasure.
But then get over it.
Don't sit upon it too long.
Say it and forget.
Give it sometime.
Use it only when you feel
You are right.
As such good and bad,
Right and wrong
Are all myths my friend.
So do listen
To your inner voice.
But say it on face
When you feel it right.
Never on your own.
No. Let the situation happen.
And then let those words flow
Razor sharp, give the blow.
And then see the effect
Light and free
Bliss so red.

Zombied

She tries
with all her might
To give it love
To bring it back to life.
The life that has escaped
From it's once bright eyes.
She sings to it
That lullaby
That she often sang
When the baby was alive.
She now looks
At the large sack
Lying silent
On the bed.
Sleeping, talking to
It's own walls
Shutting the outer world
Lost in the nostalgic file.
The baby! She misses it.
She calls other children
To come and be alive
All around her child.
She sings, she tries to talk
But no.
Nothing works on her
Dead child.
She cries
In the solitariness of her nights.
She prays deeply
To her faith, to remove
That wild effect
Out of her child.
But the kid
It is poisoned.
With the reality
Called life.
And it lives now
Zombied
Almost dead like.

EDM in head

EDM in head today
Can't stop my feet.
Feel Unstoppable.
So electrified.
I feel fired.
All set for new.
So powerful.
Like a winner.
The pressure inside
Is hard to subside.
Like I can fly.
Even burst
Like a fireball.
Just this moment.
The beats.
The heartbeat.

Roleplay

What if I say
That I role play
While writing my poems.
That the emotions are true.
Not extremities.
But somewhere
Inside
It all might be true.
When I look at those actors
On screen.
I wonder
What must be in their mind
While acting that
When transcended
Into a character like that.
What about the love scenes,
Even the sad ones.
To bring tears to your eyes
Is easy.
But how do they get
The sorrow into their eyes?
How do they show
The depth of soul?
And there I find
A similee
That emotions are limited.
Life just seems to be of many.
How boring it all seems
From one point of view
Just keep changing the faces
The same spot
Different scenes.
As many stories
Same emotions.
Sometimes we even find
Same to same names.
Some we feel we have
A soul connection with.
Some seem so different
So out of our league.
But it is all same
My friend.
Every story
With it's every range.
We are all diving
In the same ocean.
The waves might differ.
I might be this today.
Tommorow it will seem
All different.
But in this life
Where we want to
Achieve something
Be somebody.
We are all just diving
In the ocean of
Roleplay.

Red wall

On every special
Puff of breath
A picture comes in my mind.
Like a dear fragrance
From past.
No person in particular.
But a self painted
Red wall.
Full of pictures.
And that ehsaas
Of being in that room.
Living it free.
I being me.
I pull myself back
From that Street
That reached
A beautiful lakeside park.

I feel thankful
For my present.
Realise I am wasting it
Thinking of past and future.
That I should be in this moment.
And I realise
The eternal
Wheel of thoughts.
The end of one song.
And hollowness
Fills my mind.
I decide
To end the story
Right there.
But there
Another beautiful song
Begins.
It's a man
Wailing for his past.
But the music is sweet.
Human folly.
Yet too touchy.
Am I denying
The emotions?
Why?
Guess wanna stay practical.
To 'move on'.
To where?
I wonder.
'It's no easy journey',
I feel.
The pain that inside
Sits.
Keyboard songs
With all it's wooden hollowness.
Flute weeps
With the scream
Of a throat
Subdued
Into the inner spirit.
It says,
Change the song!
This one is nice.
Classical Sur.
The picture too
Seemed satisfied.
But the pain
In this voice.
Aah! Sitar in background.
Like a fort in dessert.
And there another one
Remembers someone.
He says, 'she is merged
In his memories.
Into him'.
I laugh
At the many headedness
Of this beautiful pain.
The pain called love.
The emotion
So beautifully sprayed
In the painting of our lives.
Like a varnish
That protects us
From dust.
That makes us shine.
Like a change in contrast
Every color under it
Shines.
But also are illuminated
The flaws of the painting.
Places which require shading.
Lines that become haunting.
And there I feel
The overall effect
That love gives.
Connection with the whole.

I can reach you

Maybe just maybe
I can reach you
And pull you
Right into my self.
For a moment or two
I will stroke your hair
Will keep your head in my lap
Will give you a massage.
Relax your shoulders
Even your neck.
Will let my cold fingers
Make hints of circles
Around your eyes.
And if you will fall asleep
I will lay by your side.
But if you would rather
Choose to feel life
That will be the moment
To get wild.
I would rather have you bare
Of your burdens
 And pains
Like bring them on
And then
Just let them be.
Tell me.
I will listen to you.
Or just be silent.
I won't judge you.
But for those moments
That we gonna be together
All I want from you
Is you to be
Really you.
Maybe just maybe
I will reach you
And pull
Right into myself.

Miracles happen!

Have faith. Give your best.
Miracles happen.
You get to rest.
Cosmos has it's own designs.
Desire deep.
Don't stress your mind.
It is weird
How we value things
When they are
Not in our hands.
Either before or after.
Never when it is there
Right beside
Smiling right.
Maybe we do value sometimes
Every fleeting moment.
The passing
Of time.
But dearie
Life is so
Not in our hands.
Have faith in cosmos.
Give your story
The best you can.

Violin on wind

Aah! The cloud
Of nostalgia.
So beautiful.
So colourful.
I am in your arms.
And we swim
In the flow of chords.
Like a violin
Exposed to a stormy wind.
And left
On it's own accord.
It plays
Wild then smooth.
Pampering the passion
Even soul.
The cloud bursts
Bringing me
To your absence
So deeply present
All around me.
And I couldn't see?
Maybe I avoided.
For I wasn't strong enough.
Or maybe I was
Way too strong
It needs strength to leave love
For hence lies
The true love.
And I set you free
My friend.
And there I understand love
Like a pinch of salt extra
Way too extra
In an otherwise mundane curry.
And I gulp down the burning
Extra salty paste.
For it gives me the flavour
Of extreme, of pain.
And I dive into those waves
Crawling greedily
On a sandy shore.
This time at night
With the warmth of water
Gently warming
The cold sand - spread
All around.
Heaped like a depository.
But the waves enter deep
Right through the pores.
And there I feel love
Flowing in my nerves.
You merged in me.
I feel free.

Underground Metro

While using underground Metro
A thought occurred to my mind
Aren't we taking modern versions
Of ancient models of tunnels
For granted
Those tunnels connected states
Sometimes countries
These tunnels
Are more webbed
All over a city
And it is way too quick
Imagine the change
The mobility.
Time does change
But the models remain
Well! Modernity.
Or is it Post?
Wait till we too
Become ancient
And to reach a place
You disappear
Into a thin cloud.

Breaking into an everyday

The strong coffee
Aromatic morning
I feel happy and revived
To experience this
This morning.
It is so comfortable
An everyday.
A pan so busy frying
Fresh vegetables into
Cooked delicacies.
A set of eyes
Sleeping peacefully
Right parallel to this room.
A distant motor on road
Breaks the trance
While merging into
An everyday.

Down my spine

A sudden chill
Down my spine
Throughout my legs.
I shiver to the nursing arms
So cold with the absence.
I kiss gently
The rusted soft tissues
With that pattern of chap
So dried with exposure
To time and smoke.
Unlayering the hard earned layers
Of ego and solitude.
Of a broken muse.
The eyes they have lost
Their spark.
And there I see
My reflection.
That probably is
The attraction.

Kisi ke jeeney mein

'Ik shabhnami moti ne meri
Tamaam zindagi thaveel kar di.
Ik lamhe ke liye.
Is lamhe ho Kaise fariyaad karun
Jisne meri zindagi sanwari
Jisne mujhe khwabon ki
Dher saari khushiyon se
Aarasta kiya
Zindagi yun hi jamagati rhegi
Kai safino mein.
Zara Gaur kar ke dekh
Is chehkti duniya ko
Yahan kuch nahi bus
Ik gamo ka khazana hai.
Zindagi to iske baad
Shuru hone wali hai.
Jab jyun ki yaqeen AA jayega.
In lamhon ki khoobsurti ko
Khushiyon SE nibhaya karo
Vrna yadein to rahengi
Par tum dhundhte rahoge.
Milegi tum ko ye hargiz
Magar tum rahoge
Wo na rahega.
Kai aur khwabein honge
Tabeerein to hongi usmei
Magar tabeer karne wala na hoga.
Zindagi to bus
Chaar dino ka faasla hai.
Rooh to tadpegi apki
Magar mujasma na hoga.
Zindagi mein dushwarian
Ayein jayengi.
Dushwariyan rahengi
Magar tumhari dastaan
Tak na rahegi.
Dastano main.
Bahaut ho gye afsane yaron
Kisi ke jeeney ke liye
Apna jeena
Kurbaan kar dete hain.'

Lamhe lamhe ko jeete hain
Chal aaj is pal ko seete hain
Yaqeen aur mohabbat
Imaam aur muqaddar.
Kal ayega shayad
Kal hi.
Tum chale jaogey.
Hum bhi jeena seekh lenge
Kal ka kya pata
Kya tum aogey?
Is pal mein jee lete hain
Zindagi rahegi
To kuch aur pal payenge
Yakeeno yaarano mein khumaar
Kal bhi humei
Saath khada payenge.

'Parvaaz' aur Mystical Wanderer

Turning slowly into purple

Sea beach
You and I
We are playing
Running on shimmering
White sand
Sun showers
Shades of red
In a sky like
A color pallette
I can see many shades
Of red and yellow
Turning slowly into purple
Finally merging
In the deep blue sea.
I collect some shells
Lazing so free.
But I can't carry them.
For then I will pull them
Out of there fate.
They look beautiful
In the wide open sea.
They belong to it.
Freedom
Is this moment.
Art is born-free.

Magical like always

Playing the rhythm again
It's magical like always
It always touches my soul
Relaxing instrumental music
This one is just violin
Along with waves
Crashing some shore
They touch some chord inside
A corner of which
Am not sure.
To write
I have to compromise
For the music stops then
And yet it has it's aftereffects
It leaves it's traces hence.
Like an affair right after
You split
For a little time
You are still used to
Those tiny acts so inhabited
As part of your
Just lost life.
Sometimes the time stretches
So long to an obsession.
But every memory fades down
If not life then death takes hand.
And here dies the memory
I try so hard to remember it
The sand just lost from my fist
Trolling from the sandy shore.
I look at the scarred colors
A design now smeared
And then I wipe
The scattered footsteps
Of a presence
No more with me.
There I sit again
Once again redoing
The picture I once began
Only this time
The colors are new
Upon same stencil
Fresh to comprehend.
The picture is
Even better.

Tattoos of time

You magnify your layer
To a closer view
Wearing all it's atrocities
With pride
Like tattoos of time.
The silver rhymes.
The waves rave over your face.
And you try to create
Yet another maze.
This time showing
The inner confusion
Outside.
Alas! The world
Still considers it
A mask!
Only a hard layer below
Is the soft crush
The real flow
That is not devoid
Of moist my friend.
That is still warm
Unlike crust so close.

Spell bounded

The magnificent set of eyes
Spell bounding conversation
A heart so pure
A meet to lure
It was magical
The first meet.
I loved every moment of it
The coffee, the walk,
Sitting by a running street.
You are a raw soul
So experienced
Warm and cold.
Eyes to enchant every glance
Cheeks with dimples in it
Those three lines on either sides
Of your eyes
When you smile
They are incredible.
And the way you express
Such adversities
In a way so simple
They are your fuel
They bring a glow in your eyes
A man without lies.
Thanks for a beautiful meet
Will wait for yet another one
And another one.
For that is what friendships require
A constant nurturing
A little time.

When I dress up

When I dress up
A bit more
Like more than
The casual ragged me
I feel conscious.
Like too beautiful to be true
For the crowd looks at me
In such way.
And I get such eager glances
On my way.
Some eyes filled with desire
Some lashes aroused
To admire.
And I feel funny about
Those teasing piercing eyes
Of various aunts outside.
Most try to closely observe
A flaw or more
To criticise.
A sudden smile
At an innocent situation
Comes as a surprise.
'Was it really me?
Out of my walls
On surrender.'
But it makes me light
This being bright.
For the observations
Are all in my mind.
And situation too
Is mirror image of inside.