मोती सी

किसी सींप में रखी
मोती सी
रेत में दबी छोटी सी
मन ही मन चमक रही हूँ
इंतज़ार में
उस एक नज़र के
जो इस सींप पर पड़ेगी
और मुझको चुनेगी
शायद मुझे इस सींप से
बाहर निकालना चाहिये।

पर डरती हूँ
कहीं इस रेत के समुन्दर में
दब न जाऊं
कहीं ये लेहरें मुझे
ले न चलें
कहीं इस बड़ी सी  दुनिया में
मैं खो न जाऊं।

फिर लगता है
हमेशा बंद रहना
भी तो एक मौत है
उस एक नज़र का इन्तज़ार
जाने कितनी लंबी रात है।

पर सींप ने मुझे
संभाल कर रखा है
बहुत प्यार से
ऐशो आराम से
सरो-ताज बना कर रखा है।

पर फिर भी जाने क्यों
लुडक कर
बाहर भाग जाने को
ये जी चाहता है।
गर गुम भी हो गयी तो क्या
बंद ज़िन्दगी से अच्छी
आज़ाद गुमनामी को
ये जी चाहता है।

फिर लगता है
आज़ाद तो अब भी हूँ
सब सोच की ही तो बात है
ये प्यार और अदब
सब बस सींप के बस की बात है।

लेकिन बाहर निकली कहाँ हूँ
और फिर सोच सोच की बात है
जाने ज़िन्दगी कहाँ ले जाये
वो सब सींप के बाहर की बात है।

किसी सींप में रखी
मोती सी
रेत में दबी छोटी सी
मन ही मन चमक रही हूँ
इंतज़ार में
उस एक नज़र के
जो इस सींप पर पड़ेगी
और मुझको चुनेगी
शायद मुझे इस सींप से
बाहर निकालना चाहिये।

Another opening

The soul finds dead-end
Many a times.
The death of one self
The end of specific rhyme.
It seems like all is dead
The hard work seems wasted
Heaven causes wrath.
The best thing
about death
However
Is life.
That still survives.
The regeneration.
Back again -
To an upside ride.
So when one self dissolves
Worry not.
For though it dies
That one side
But the soul remains
Larger than life.
And soul
knows it Inside.

Where gypsy sits

Once everyday he visits
Those mysterious walls
Where gypsy sits.
He finds them all mystical
Every brick.
The breeze in her locks
Sings freedom to his ears.
Her confident voice
Give strength
To his tears.
He finds her unique
Her every word
The soul beneath.
Curiosity drives him crazy
Once every day he visits
Those mysterious walls
Where gypsy sits.

He visits for random reasons
Pretexts, excuses,
Different seasons.
He tries to lure her to civility
Just to get fascinated
By her wilderness
By her ethnicity.
More he tries to keep a check
More her aura causes heart wreck
She is peace and a storm
At the same time
Aah! Gypsy woman
And the wild rhyme.

Promises

Every night the water
Promises moon to earth
Beautiful, shiny;
It keeps changing shapes
Sometimes when it disappears
Earth gets afraid
For in the water
It seems so close
Her moon,
The one she chose
But water plays a trick in between
Giving earth something
Just to be seen.
She tries to embrace that moon
But it seems matterless
She seeks it all the more
For the moon laughs
Right on the shore.
But meet never happens
Just an illusion.
The love remains
So do the illusion.

To create

This deep felt thirst
This uncalled craving
To create
Create a new fondling.
In words, visuals, even colors
To fill life in the creation
With my genes smeared.
Or may be the heart
wants to feel
The post creation satisfaction
To see that baby
Vulnerable and alive
A social subtraction.
Won't I have expectations then?
Of a mother wanting her child
To be the best of them?
Like always
I see no comparison
No race
No me and them.
Why not adopt
Others' creation?
That's illegal
That is not the same stem.
So off I create
A new beauty
A novel jam.
This one is again a hybrid
Of thoughts and ideologies
Imagination and I.
It reflects me
A fragment of mine.

But the heart
it wants more.
Never satisfied in one
It never cures.
More creations
And more reciprocations.
Like a series of desires
The fire keeps thirsting for more.

Sometimes I wonder
Is there an end to it?
But it is more about the process
I feel
It is the thirst that is its beauty
The creation process
Along with creation of it.

So I dive into the ocean
Forming waves and rapids.
I form those abstract pictures
Amidst clouds
As I sit.
And in the breeze I find love
In water - the embrace.
The process of living,
The feeling to create.

This deep felt thirst
This uncalled craving
To create
Create a new fondling.

Amidst auctions and baits

Sale sale sale
People selling themselves
People buying people
There are auctions and baits
Judgements and debates.
Sale Sale Sale
Every breath is a commodity
essentials, life, name
Even entity.
So and so is this much
So and so is way much!
Parameters and comparisons
A constant race
The doomed phase!

Look! Look further.
It's a life, a person, a city,
dream, desire, hope, faith.
Look closer!
It's a wish, a belief,
Personality, grief.

Penetrate into the
cosmic psyche
The life beyond money
One cosmic entity.

Look closer!
It's futile.
The endless race has
A shallow prize.

All will then seem one
celestial beings, life around
Air we breathe, people we meet
Animals that seem on disposal
Nature that seems vulnerable
All will then seem one
Unsellable, invaluable,
Precious and one.

Yet the chains

On one hand its I
And the life that I admire
On another are people
Whom I love
And want to be with.
Even when I choose the latter
Well they are always busy.
But when I opt for former
There is guilt of missing them.
The Oppertunity cost
Seems love
When I choose myself
And the life I love.
The sacrifice of self
Is huge too
And it has been always
An eternal split
The push and pull.
Aah! If only
Teleportation was possible
Talent was valued
love was free
And time wasn't
Taken for granted.
But life is limited
Love has conditions
Jobs have limitations.
And happy moments
Are always rationed.
They say
It is all always balanced.
That laughter is always
Measured in tears
And love is compensated
With long lonely fears.
Aah! The Oppertunity cost
And this will of free life.
They say, we are born free
Yet the chains
Are eternally beside.

I feel beautiful

I feel beautiful
After a bit of pamper
The oiling and cleaning
I think more than the output
It is more about
The process in itself.
The moments spent
In loving oneself
Caressing
Feeling beautiful.
It's a wow feeling.
And I wonder
Why don't I do it
more often?
Why it's after years
That I remembered
Taking care
Of those small things
About me.
But that's what makes it
Special
This feeling of love
Being beauty.

Wo sab kiye

Ik arsa hua
Wo sab kiye
Jo kabhi har lamha
Hua karta tha
Wo shaqhs Jo apne they
Wo sarey sach
Jo kabhi sapne they
Wo fir shaqhs bn gye
Fir sapnon mein
Tabdeel ho gye
Waqt to chalta jaata hai
Saath behte hain
Log, yadein, batein.
Bahaut acha hona bhi
Koi bahaut achi baat nahi
Ya shayad bahaut achche
Hum kabhi they hi nahi
Ik arsa hua
Wo sab kiye
Jo kabhi
Har lamha hua karta tha.